Season 2 - Episode 4

DENY, DENY, DENY

MEREDITH VOICE OVER (MVO): The key to surviving a surgical internship is denial. We deny that we’re tired; we deny we’re scared, we deny how badly we want to succeed and most importantly we deny that we’re in denial. 

We only see what we wanna see and believe what we want to believe. And it works. We lie to ourselves so much that after a while the lies start to seem like the truth. 

We deny so much that we can’t recognize the truth…right in front of our faces. 

GEORGE: I don’t know when I left Cristina said she was okay. 

IZZIE: Nobody goes what she went through and is totally over it by now. 

GEORGE: Cristina can. 

MEREDITH: She’s fine. 

IZZIE: Too fine. She’s cold. 

GEORGE: No she’s hardcore. She’s got ice in her veins. She does what she has to do to get through it. 

IZZIE: She lost a baby. She lost a fallopian tube and she’s acting like she doesn’t even care. She’s all hello, I’m totally fine person. I mean she’s my friend too but she’s acting like she has no emotions or warmth, like she’s missing a soul. 

GEORGE: God she’s gonna make a great surgeon. 

IZZIE: George! 

GEORGE: It’s true. You show no weakness, you make it to the top. 

MEREDITH: Some people just keep their feelings to themselves. 

MEREDITH: Addison gave Derek divorce papers which is good. I mean she’s still here being Addison but it’s not like I’m jealous or anything. 

CRISTINA (looking at the chart): That’s odd. 

MEREDITH: That’s odd I’m not jealous? 

CRISTINA: No you have every right to be jealous. It’s your territory and she’s peeing all over it. (looks back at the chart) What’s odd is Burke’s patient. She’s been in 4 other hospitals this year. You know something’s not right. 

MEREDITH: You seem awfully interested in Burke’s patient. 

CRISTINA: This has nothing to do with Burke. 

MEREDITH: Cristina you lost a fallopian tube, a baby and a boyfriend all in one day. You have the right to be upset. 

CRISTINA: And you’re losing Mc Dreamy to his perfect wife. You have a right to be jealous. 

MEREDITH: I did not lose Mc Dreamy. Divorce papers, remember? And I’m not jealous. 

CRISTINA: And I’m not upset. 

Meredith's Voice Over: Sometimes reality has a way of sneaking up and biting us in the ass. 

And when the damn bursts all you can do is swim. 

The world of pretend is cage. Not a cocoon. 

 We can only lie to ourselves for so long. 

We are tired. We are scared. Denying it doesn’t change the truth. 

 Sooner or later we have to put aside our denial … and face the world head on gun’s blazing. 

 Denial. It’s not just a river in Egypt. It’s a freaking

ocean. 

: So how do you keep from drowning in it? 

-end-

 

Season 2 Episode 3

MAKE ME LOSE CONTROL

MEREDITH VOICE OVER (MVO): Surgeons are control freaks. With a scalpel in your hand, you feel unstoppable. 

There’s no fear, there’s no pain. You’re 10 feet tall and bullet proof. 

And then you leave the O.R. 

And all that perfection. All that beautiful control just falls to crap.

DR. SHEPARD: What are you doing here? 

RICHARD: I’m going back to work. 

DR. SHEPARD: You’re not cleared for surgery. 

RICHARD: Leave me alone. I’ve been sitting home for a week watching Oprah giving away things on TV. Oprah, Derek! … You clear me now or I’ll hurt you. 

DR. SHEPARD: If you want me to clear you so soon, maybe you should’ve thought about that before you gave chief to Burke and invited Satan to Seattle. 

RICHARD: Satan? 

ADDISON: Good morning. Richard, like the hat. 

DR. SHEPARD: Satan speaks. 

ADDISON: Actually I prefer to be called ruler of all that is evil. (Richard laughs) But I will answer to Satan. 

DR. BAILEY: Need something? 

MEREDITH: I’m coming in. 

DR. BAILEY: No you’re not. 

MEREDITH: I am. I’m her friend. 

DR. BAILEY: Exactly. She’s lying on the operating table, naked, exposed. She’s sedated but she’s probably scared out of her mind. Now right now she’s not a doctor. She’s not your friend. She’s a patient and she deserves to have all the privacy I can give her. You’re not going in there. 

Meredith's Voice Over: It’s a sign of weakness. Of not being up to the task. 
  
 And still there are times when it just gets away from you. 

When the world stops spinning. And you realize that your shiny little scalpel isn’t gonna save you. 

 No matter how hard you fight it. You fall. And its scary as hell. 



 Except there’s an upside to free falling. It’s the chance you give your friends to catch you. 

-end-

-

Season 2 - Episode 2

ENOUGH IS ENOUGH

Meredith Voice Over (MVO): I have an aunt who whenever she poured anything for you would say ‘say when’

My aunt would say ‘say when’ and of course we never did. 

 More tequila, more love, more anything, more is better. 

We don’t say when because there’s something about the possibility of more. 

More tequila, more love, more anything, more is better. 

MEREDITH: It’s not us. It’s them. Them and their stupid boy … pe****s. They didn’t tell me they had a wife. They gave absolutely no warning that they were going to break up with you. 


CRISTINA: It’s not that Burke broke up with me. It’s how he broke up with me. Like it was business. Like it was a business trans, like he’s the boss of me! 

MEREDITH: He is the boss of you. 

CRISTINA: And what’s worse? Is that I care. 

MEREDITH: I’m gonna throw up again.

CRISTINA: The problem is estrogen. 

MEREDITH: No the problem is tequila. 

CRISTINA: I used to be all business and then he goes and gets me pregnant. 

MEREDITH: With the stupid boy penis. 

CRISTINA: I am having hormone surges. He ruined me. I’m ruined. He turned me into this fat, stupid pregnant girl. Who cares! Estrogen! 

MRS. SEIBERT: You think I’m sick for wanting me to save my husband. Don’t you? 

CRISTINA: I think … you’re feeling very emotional and when we’re feeling emotional sometimes it’s, sometimes it’s hard to keep a level head and consider all the facts. …. Your husband killed a man on the highway today. He almost killed you and your son. Those are the facts. MRS. SEIBERT: Have you ever been in love Doctor? (Cristina looks at her) Have you? 

CRISTINA: Love has its limits. 

ALEX: My anger had a life of its own. I walked off, became a wrestler and the next time he laid a hand on my mother I beat the living crap out of him. When he got out of the hospital he took off. Just took off and never came back. He was a cold mean tempered bastard, but he was still my old man you know? (Scott nods) But now, now I can’t stop wishing that I never laid a hand on him. Wish somehow that I could’ve worked it through.

DR. SHEPARD: Just when the day was improving. 

ADDISON: You told Meredith what happened? 

DR. SHEPARD: I did. What did you tell her? 

ADDISON: That sometimes people do desperate things to attract attention.

DR. SHEPARD : What? Wow. That’s your side of this? That I didn’t pay you enough attention. Is that you were thinking when you got naked with my best friend? 

ADDISON: No, by that point I wasn’t thinking at all Derek. By that point I was just scratching an itch. We got successful you and me. We got busy and we got lazy. We didn’t even bother to fight any more Derek. And Mark was there and I missed you. And now I’m sorry. (Derek pushes his floor button again) I’m more sorry than you can possibly imagine. (The elevator bings) But at least I’m talking to you about it. 

ADDISON : Derek. 

DR. SHEPARD: I’m a sink with an open drain honey. 

Meredith's Voice Over: There’s something to be said about a glass half full.

About knowing when to say when. 

I think it’s a floating line. A barometer of need and desire.
It’s entirely up to the individual.

And depends on what’s being poured. 

Sometimes all we want is a taste.

 Other times, there’s no such thing as enough.

The glass is bottomless. 

And all we want is more. 

-end-

Season 2 - Episode 1

RAINDROPS KEEP FALLIN' IN MY HEAD

Meredith's Voice Over: To be a good surgeon, you have to think like a surgeon. Emotions are messy. Tuck them neatly away and step into a clean, sterile room where the procedure is simple. Cut, suture and close.

But sometimes, you're faced with a cut that won't heal.

A cut that rips it's stitches wide open.

Joe: You look familiar. You been here before?

Meredith: Once. That worked out really well.

Joe: I know that look. It'll be one of two things. Either your boss is giving you hell or your boyfriend is. Which is it?

Meredith: Both.

Meredith: My boyfriend is my boss, which was a problem. But not as big a problem as the fact that my boyfriend has a wife.

Joe: Tell you what, this one, it's on the house.

Alex: He's a lightweight. Could've pinned him in a second if I wanted.

Izzie: Yeah, so why didn't you?

Alex: Are you kidding? I'm riding a career in Plastics all the way to the bank. Can't afford to injure these babies.  Especially over some one like O'Malley.

Izzie: You had it coming.

Alex: The dude punches like my sister.

Izzie: Oh! So, by your definition then you got beat up by a girl.

Meredith: Let's play a game of whose life sucks the most. I'll win. I always win.

Cristina: No, you don't want to play with me.

Meredith: Oh, I do. I'll even go first. Derek's married.

Cristina: George, beer is dripping from your nostrils.

Meredith: Told you I'd win.

Cristina: No, you didn't win.

Meredith: Did you hear me? I said Derek is married. As in pigheaded, adulterous, liar married. Nothing you could say could top that.

Cristina: I'm pregnant. I win.

Izzie: 4238. Mom with the really cute kids. She spiked a post-op fever last night. You spent two hours monitoring her.

Alex: Hernia chick. That's right.

Izzie: You have been treating these people for the last week. How can you not know their names?

Alex: Surgery is the only specialty where we don't waste time getting to know the patients. They're slabs of meat, we're butchers.

Izzie: They're human beings. You do know what a human is, don't you Evil Spawn?

Alex: I'm not evil. Unless evil turns you on.

Izzie: Do you ever wake up in the morning, realize nobody likes you, and, I don't know, care?

Alex: Oh. I think somebody likes me.

Meredith: Talking to yourself now?

George: Yes. No! damn it, I'm a bad sponge. A leaky sponge. I'm gonna leak all the wrong secrets. I'm a bad liar, can't even lie about talking to myself. You look nice today.

Meredith: Wore my new lip gloss. Cause my ex-boyfriend's wife looks like Isabella freaking Rossellini, and I'm like?me. I'm trying to outdo her when she's the victim here. How crazy is that?

George: Not crazy. Smart. You know, gloss, you know, prevents chapped lips and? you? ex-boyfriend?

Meredith: I'm an evil mistress.

George: Well, still. You look nice.

Derek: One night I parked my car, I unlock my front door, go inside my house, and something 's different. Nothing's different, everything's the same, but yet, still, something's different. And I stand there for a while. And then I know. See, there are moments for me, you know, usually when I'm in the OR, when I just know what's gonna happen next. So I go upstairs. As I'm walking down the hall, I trying to prepare myself for what I'm gonna see when I go into my bedroom. I step on a man's jacket that doesn't belong to me. And everything I think I know?just shifts. Because the jacket that doesn't belong to me is a jacket that I recognize. And what I know now is that when I go into my bedroom, I'm not just gonna see that my wife is cheating on me. I'm gonna see that my wife is cheating on me with Mark, who happened to be my best friend. It's just so pedestrian, common and dirty, and cruel. Mostly just cruel. I left, came out here.

Meredith: And you met me.

Derek: And I met you.

Meredith: Well, what was I to you? The girl you screwed to get over being screwed?

Derek: You were like coming up for fresh air. It's like I was drowning and you saved me. That's all I know.

Meredith: It's not enough.

Meredith's Voice Over: The say practice makes perfect. Theory is, the more you think like a surgeon, the more you become one.

 The better you get at remaining neutral, clinical.

 Cut, suture, close.

And the harder it becomes to turn it off?

to stop thinking like a surgeon.

And remember what it means to think like a human being.

-end-

Season 1 - Episode 9

WHO'S ZOOMIN' WHO?

Meredith's Voice Over: Secrets can't hide in science. Medicine has a way of exposing the lies. Within the walls of the hospital, the truth is stripped bare.

How we keep our secrets outside the hospital...Well, that's a little different.

One thing is certain. Whatever it is we're trying to hide, we're never ready for that moment when the truth gets naked.

That's the problem with secrets. Like misery, they love company.

They pile up and up until they take over everything.

Until you don't have room for anything else.

Until you're so full of secrets, you feel like you're going to burst.

Cristina: Hey, syph-boy.

George: You told her?

Izzie: Just Cristina.

Alex: "Syph-boy." It's got a nice ring to it, it's kinda like Superboy, only diseased.

Cristina: Izzie didn't have to say a word. Around here, the only thing that spreads faster than disease is gossip.

George: That's not true. Just cause Izzie can't keep her mouth shut doesn't mean everyone knows.

Meredith: Hey, George. How are you feeling? Sorry about the syphilis.

George: Everyone in this hospital knows?

Alex: Knows you're a player.

George: You're disturbed.

Alex: True. Everybody's got a secret. Just be glad yours is out in the open.

Cristina: Oh, yeah, Alex? What's yours?

Alex: You show me yours, and I'll show you mine.

Alex: I bet you've got some seriously kinky skeletons in your closet.

Cristina: What's in my closet is none of your business.

Izzie: Well, I don't have any secrets. My life is boring.

Meredith: Everybody's got something to hide.

Bailey: Don't even tell me you're doing what I think you're doing!

Cristina: Um...

Bailey: Not only did you disregard the family's wishes, you broke the law! You could be arrested for assault! Do you like jail? The hospital could be sued! I could lose my license, my job! I like my job! Did you think about any of this before you started cutting open a poor man's body? I could seriously kick both of your asses right now. Do you have anything to say?

(Izzie picks up Mr. Franklin's heart from the scales)

Izzie: Look at his heart.

Bailey: It's huge!

Izzie: It's over 600 grams, and there's some kind of grainy material in it.

Cristina: We want to run some tests.

Bailey: Oh, now you want to run tests?

Cristina: At this point, what could it hurt?

Bailey: I hate both of you right now.

Richard: Meredith? He's an attending. You're an intern.

Meredith: You saw us? You can see.

Richard: I'm gonna tell you what your mother would say if she were here. You're
making a mistake, a big one.

Meredith: And I would tell my mother it's not a mistake.

Meredith's Voice Over: The thing people forget is how good it can feel when you finally set secrets free.

Whether good or bad, at least they're out in the open, like it or not.

And once your secrets are out in the open, you don't have to hide behind them anymore.

The problem with secrets is even when you think you're in control...

...you're not.

- end of season 1 -

Season 1- Episode 8

SAVE ME

Meredith's Voice Over: You know how when you were a kid and you believed in fairy tales?

That fantasy of what your life would be. White dress, Prince Charming, Who'd carry you away to a castle on a hill. You'd lie in bed at night and close your eyes, and you had complete and utter faith.

Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy, Prince Charming, they were so close, you could taste them.

But eventually, you grow up. One day you open your eyes, and the fairy tale disappears.

Most people turn to the things and people they can trust.

But the thing is, it's hard to let go of that fairy tale entirely. Cause almost everyone still has that smallest bit of hope, of faith, that one day they'll open their eyes and it will all come true.

Meredith: It's just that I hardly know anything about you.

Derek: You know I'm from New York. You know I like ferry boats.

Meredith: Enough with the ferry boats. What about your friends?

Derek: I'm a surgeon. I don't have friends.

Meredith: Everybody has friends. I mean, who do you hang out with? What do you do on your days off? These are important questions.

Devo: I hear they call you Dr. Evilspawn.

Alex: Well, only the people that like me.

Devo: I guess that explains the lack of faith thing.

Alex: You know, I kind of think of myself as a pagan, but, hey, that's just me.

Devo: You know what it's like being a teenager these days? My friends spend most of their time screwing around and getting wasted. At least I have God.

Alex: Well, so God wants you to die, huh?

Devo: He wants me to be passionate about what I believe in. You don't believe in anything.

Alex: Well, my mother used to pray to Saint Jude for me.

Devo: How appropriate. Patron saint of lost causes.

Alex: Mmm.

Meredith: You know, you keep taking everything on faith. How do you know what's real and what's not?

Derek: You just do. You know some people would call this a relationship. The kind where you exchange keys, leave your toothbrush over.

Meredith: Who? Who would call it that?

Derek: Me. I would.

Meredith: And I'm supposed to believe you?

Derek: Uh-huh.

Meredith: Show me something. Give me a reason to believe.

Meredith's Voice Over: At the end of the day, faith is a funny thing.

 It turns up when you don't really expect it.

 It's like one day you realize that the fairy tale may be slightly different than you dreamed.

 The castle, well...it may not be a castle.

 And it's not so important that it's happy ever after.

Just that it's happy right now.

See, once in a while, once in a blue moon, people will surprise you.

And once in a while...people may even take your breath away.

-end-